What does the Edith Fox Life & Loss Centre do?

Primarily we provide clinical grief counselling support in a group process through facilitated therapy using nature, creative arts and the human-animal bond

We work with your reaction to your loss. Grief can include physical, psychological, and behavioural changes.,

Lambs for Children is a program aimed at children living in situations where they have experienced the loss of a parent, sibling, other family member or friend, or are living with a terminally ill family member. Sometimes the death of a pet - often a child's first death experience. Loss may be through death, divorce, separation - even loss of familiar surroundings in the case of frequent moves from city to city, can be a damaging loss experience to a child. We also offer other programs, still dealing with loss issues such as Drums R'Us, which uses the sounds, rhythm and physical activity of the drumming as a trigger to express emotions arising from loss-related situations.

Who else would be in a Group?

Intake interviews are carried out for all programs to ensure a compatible mix of issues, people and ages. Often ourin groups include all types of loss which are discussed within group; this helps to validate each person's own suffering in a realistic and inclusive way. Same issues, different people; the ideals of tolerance, sharing, recognition and witnessing of others pain and courage in dealing with it are critical factors in the healing/growth process - factors enhanced through the group process due to the diversity.

What do you mean by Loss? What other Losses do you deal with?

Loss is one of the fundamental experiences of life - for some the death of their life partner or spouse may be the greatest loss they ever feel. Everyone who forms an attachment with another person suffers a full range of emotions when that attachment ends no matter how the end comes. Even when that attachment is for a pet, maybe a dog or cat, maybe a pony, the devastation that results when the animal dies is real; it hurts, lasts for a long time and affects the person to such an extent that their life and behaviour are changed. The Centre provides all who have suffered a loss - whatever it may have been - a supportive, non-judgmental and non-discriminatory environment in which to discover what emotions, thoughts, behaviours are causing them pain. We find appropriate ways to address the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of the whole individual.

No loss issue is too small to be unworthy of discussion, no one person's loss is more important or a greater loss than another's - it's their loss, and they have a right and a need to work their way through it. The Centre's grief therapists are able to support the expression of emotion utilising nature.

I heard you use Gestalt Therapy...what is that?

Essentially the Gestalt therapist will help you focus on what is happening to you now, at this moment, and what you feel right now and what you want to do right now. Loss causes extreme emotions and is almost always based on an event from the past (although it can of course also relate to abuse or a bad situation, which is still happening in the present.) Continuing to stay focused in the past may mean that a person is more prone to depression and/or constantly focusing on the future with worry can increase anxiety. Constantly dwelling on the past or always anticipating the future results in inability to find emotional, physical and spiritual satisfaction in the present!

Loss Needs Form

While the event itself will never go away, it's part of one's life forever. Time is needed for the reflection of that relationship. People learn to explore all aspects of their grief. It is this "witnessing" that often enhances the grief process when working with groups.

What is the environment at the Centre? Will I be comfortable?

The Centre's activities take place in The Pig House; it's a cozy space for groups of 6 to 12 people, situated right on the Bay of Quinte, Ontario, Canada and surrounded by nature. Converted from an original Pighouse, it now has a high ceiling, white walls and bright original paintings and art from the County and elsewhere. A corner stove keeps it warm in the winter, and a patio facing the water, and totally private is a favourite group setting in spring, summer and fall.

When should a person use programs such as yours?

Often agencies and physicians refer to the Centre. Both children and adult. A family may call and start the process for participation without a referral. We appreciate each person and family grieves differently. Often a parent will need to ensure the children are being supported to a satisfactory level before they themselves can address their individual issues.

Do Children need therapy for grief?

Can we ever give them too much support to take risks? Our gentle approach to grief groups is to let them lead, and for us to follow up with supportive experiences to enhance their grief story.

Our programs are suited to help children understand loss is a normal part of life. The program is defined to suit that particular group of children - so we teach life skills while offering grief counselling.

Linda Goldman, Child Specialist reassures parents and teachers these behaviours are normal. www.childrensgrief.net

• Child retells events of the deceased's death and funeral.
• Child dreams of the deceased.
• Child feels the deceased is with him or her in some way.
• Child rejects old friends and seeks new friends who have experienced a similar loss.
• Child wants to call home during the school day.
• Child can't concentrate on homework or class work.
• Child bursts into tears in the middle of class.
• Child seeks medical information on death of deceased.
• Child worries excessively about his or her own health.
• Child sometimes appears to be unfeeling about loss.
• Child becomes "class clown" to get attention.
• Child is overly concerned with care taking needs.

All too frequently, teachers notice several of these behaviours and they do not have sufficient time to validate all they see in a day. By escalating concerns to families that may be grieving themselves, we can provide solutions to aid the grief process.

Do I have to take time off work?

Most children's groups are held during normal office hours. It takes energy to grieve; and we encourage this time be allotted in the day light hours to experience nature.

Adult groups are both daytime and evening.

How long do the group sessions last?

Some groups last 8 weeks and run for 90 minutes. We start promptly and close promptly - to enhance the therapeutic value of boundaries. We offer additional support as needed - ie, crisis We also have on-going groups - The Book Club.

Can I visit the Centre before committing to start a program?

We welcome visits by appointment only. (We may be running groups in our space!)

What are the costs? Do I have to pay in advance?

The aim of the Centre is to offer programs free of charge to those who can not afford them. Many clients pay according to their means.

Many employers recognise the value of professional counselling and understand that healthy employees are crucial to productivity in the workplace. Many corporations cover the costs of programs for their employees through their work benefit plan.

We welcome donations to supplement our fundraising efforts.

No one is ever turned away for financial reasons.